Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
