I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
