Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
tell your sister to shave her snatch
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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