real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
