Pappa wants mamma naked
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
