dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
