i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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