Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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