You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
His hands were made for my vagina.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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