Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize
