I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize
