Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Randomize
