There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
