Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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