you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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