How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Randomize