Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
