a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
