What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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