Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
My feet surprised me
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize