Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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