My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
where are my eyebrows?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
