Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
