Heybabeimwearingurpanties
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
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