We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
