Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
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