So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
