i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
