I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
