The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
