I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
