i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize
