when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
