Church boner. Awkwardddd
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
