just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
