when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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