You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize
