I CAN MOONWALK!
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I looked at my own cervix.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
