ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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