Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
