Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
