I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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