he wants to bone in the snuggie
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
