Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
how drunk are you?
Several
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
