Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
You may now shotgun with the bride
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
