I cockslap morals
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
