Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
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