i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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