Sponge bath it is.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
