it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
